Fic: Carry On: Coda
Nov. 27th, 2020 11:18 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gryfndor_godessFor context, S15 established early on that characters who have been to Hell, such as both Sam and Dean, are not allowed into Heaven. I therefore have MANY NOT-NICE FEELINGS toward the writers about the fact that Dean was so at peace with dying and Sam was able to let him go. I also have many feeilngs about the fact that Sam was left ALONE after losing his mom, Cas, Jack, AND Dean...
Title: Carry On: Coda
Summary: Sam prays for answers, because Heaven can’t take souls that have been to Hell.
Word Count: 2.5K
Warnings: Suicide ideation
Sam prays.
To Jack, first, as he carries Dean’s body out of the barn.
Jack, please, bring him back. Please bring him back.
To Amara, as he parks the Impala in the bunker’s garage and trembles in the driver’s seat, wondering if he has the strength to carry Dean’s body inside again (he’d do it in a heartbeat if it meant history would repeat itself; if Dean woke up with black eyes and Sam had to chase him down and cure him again that would be fine, it would be fine).
Amara, please, bring him back. I’m sorry we lied to you. I’m sorry we tried to kill you. I know we don’t deserve it, but please, please, please bring him back.
To Chuck even, in drunk desperation, and then hates himself a little afterward.
Chuck, if you have any powers left, please, please bring him back. We’ll be your favorites again, we’ll do anything you want, we’ll fight whatever apocalypse you throw at us, I promise.
But no one answers. Dean’s body stays cold and dead, and Sam can’t bring himself to carry him inside after all. The bunker already doesn’t feel like home anymore, but Sam can’t taint it any further. He won’t smooth out Dean’s rumpled bedsheets and blanket to lay a corpse on it. He leaves Dean in the car, with Baby, and the next day, he finds a crossroads.
Continued on AO3